Powerful Primates Misbehavin'

 • First four quotes from  Senator Kirsten Gillibrand's book,   “Off the Sidelines,”  a "part-memoir, part rallying cry for women to get involved in politics." Final "f*ck" quote from Huffpost interview.

• First four quotes from Senator Kirsten Gillibrand's book, “Off the Sidelines,” a "part-memoir, part rallying cry for women to get involved in politics." Final "f*ck" quote from Huffpost interview.

• "It was all statements that were being made by men who were well into their 60s, 70s or 80s," she says. "They had no clue that those are inappropriate things to say to a pregnant woman or a woman who just had a baby or to women in general." — Senator Gillibrand

• Below: Watch Jon Stewart on the Gillibrand revelations and reactions from female journalists:

• “We all had our stories of whom you’d not get in an elevator with and whom you’d protect your young female interns from.” —NBC/MSNBC anchor Andrea Mitchell

• “They know who they are.” —House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi

• "After I had my son three years ago, I got some comments that would blow you away from male senators...talking about getting my figure back and things like that.” —CNN correspondent Dana Bash

• “There’s a lot at stake for men and women who come forward to talk about a hostile environment and workplace harassment. Retaliation is very real, and it could come in the form of losing your job altogether or your boss making life your life terrible by controlling which job assignments you get, and whether you get a promotion or the pay you deserve. It could even take the form of additional sexual harassment. That’s why some people don’t want to pay the price for speaking out.” —Fatima Goss Graves, National Women’s Law Center

• “Up to 60 percent of people who experience harassment in the workplace don’t report it … But the majority happen in low-wage workplaces like the restaurant and agricultural industries, where workers have the fewest protections and can least afford to lose their job. —Fatima Goss Graves


 

What Dog Lovers Know

 Above: Poster by Keep Britain Tidy mashed up by Fizzdom

Above: Poster by Keep Britain Tidy mashed up by Fizzdom

• “Dogs are the leaders of the planet. If you see two life forms, one of them's making a poop, the other one's carrying it for him, who would you assume is in charge?” —Jerry Seinfeld

 grimescartoons.com

grimescartoons.com

 DoodyCalls.com

DoodyCalls.com

 grimescartoons.com

grimescartoons.com

  source: DoodyCalls.com

“Just give me a comfortable couch, a dog, a good book, and a woman. Then if you can get the dog to go somewhere and read the book, I might have a little fun.” —Groucho Marx

  DoodyCalls.com

DoodyCalls.com

• “A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than he loves himself.” —Josh Billings

Prepping for Parenthood #1

• “Like all parents, my husband and I just do the best we can, and hold our breath, and hope we’ve set aside enough money to pay for our kids’ therapy.” —Michelle Pfeiffer

• "You can learn many things from children. How much patience you have, for instance." —Franklin P. Jones

grimes cartoon 2926-come up.jpg

• "I think Lincoln had a unique parenting style. He let his kids run free and wild." —Steven Spielberg

• "One thing I had learned from watching chimpanzees with their infants is that having a child should be fun." —Jane Goodall

• Below: Wonderfully wry HBO ad touting on-the-go viewing to avoid embarrassing moments with parents (1 of 3):

• "Having children is like living in a frat house — nobody sleeps, everything's broken, and there's a lot of throwing up." —Ray Romano

• "Education, like neurosis, begins at home." —Milton Sapirstein

• "Few things are more satisfying than seeing your children have teenagers of their own." —Doug Larson

• “If your kids are giving you a headache, follow the directions on the aspirin bottle, especially the part that says, ‘keep away from children.' " —Susan Savannah

• "There really are places in the heart you don't even know exist until you love a child." —Anne Lamott

graphic-first 40 years hardest.jpg

• Our booming Boomerang Generation: "The U.S. Census Bureau reported a 5 percent point increase in the number of young men (ages 24–34) living with their parents for the period between 2005 (14%) and 2011 (19%). For the same period, the number of young women living with their parents increased from 8% in 2005 to 10% in 2011." (wikipedia)

• About the animated quote at very top (about a woman anticipating a possible divorce): A Broadway-dancer-turned comedian, Rita Rudner is a pioneering, "old-school" (non-blue) comic now working almost exclusively in Las Vegas. An accomplished author and screenwriter, her books include "I Still Have It; I Just Can't Remember Where I Put It," "Naked Beneath My Clothes" and the novels "Tickled Pink" and "Turning The Tables."

 

 

Roz Chast is a Dutiful Daughter

 fizzdom.com new yorker cartoonist roz chaste is a dutiful daughter death hospice assisted living neurotic hospice

"Mostly people are glad that I've said it was really hard, and really messy. I wanted to write about the entire experience, including the parts that were gross, and funny, and including my mixed feelings about my parents. I didn't want to write with a fake, rosy glow."  — Roz Chast

• "As they inched into their late 90s, (Chast) arranged for round-the-clock care. And she kept a horrified eye on their dwindling savings, all the while thinking: 'There goes my inheritance. It's a terrible, terrible thing and you look at yourself in the mirror and think: I'm a worm. I'm a lowly, shitty, crappy, horrible worm to be thinking about this.' " —  Roz Chast quoted by Emma BrockesTheGuardian.com

art-chast-cashmere story.png

• "Chast had done right by them, but she was still sick with regret after they were gone. 'Should I have taken them into my house? Should I have seen them more? Why didn't I love them more? You know? Am I a disgusting person?' " — Roz Chast quoted by Emma BrockesTheGuardian.com

Selected Reviews:

• “Roz Chast squeezes more existential pain out of baffled people in cheap clothing sitting around ... in crummy apartments than Dostoevsky got out of all of Russia’s dark despair. This is a great book in the annals of human suffering, cleverly disguised as fun.” — satirist Bruce McCall

• “A tour de force of dark humor and illuminating pathos about her parents’ final years as only this quirky genius of pen and ink could construe them.” —  Elle

• “Very, very, very funny, in a way that a straight-out memoir about the death of one’s elderly parents probably would not be.” — New York Times

Chast's photo in animation at top by her husband: “Bill Franzen is a humor writer who began his career in the mail room of The New Yorker. His book, Hearing From Wayne — a collection of short stories, most of them reprinted from Gentlemen’s Quarterly, National Lampoon and The New Yorker — was described by Publisher’s Weekly as “carefully crafted studies in whimsey and moments of truth....” — ridgefieldauthors.wikispaces.com

• Watch 5-minute excerpt of Roz Chast interview by New Yorker Editor David Remnick (full 15-minute version at www.hulu.com/watch/641493 )

• Chast's memoir reminds us of Deborah Hoffmann and Frances Reid's revolutionary film, Complaints of a Dutiful Daughter, about Deborah's mother's battle with Alzheimer's. Deborah's father Banesh, who died earlier, was an associate of Albert Einstein's. 

• The 1994 PBS/POV doc, an Oscar finalist and winner of a Peabody and many other awards, was the first to address the challenges of a family member with Alzheimer's using a combination of humor with appreciation for the victim's residual-yet-declining humanity

• “The taboo that I broke was that, without being disrespectful to my mother … I admitted that this is a funny situation … in any other situation, everybody would laugh … (Alzheihmer's sufferers) are really doing very crazy, insane things, and it’s okay to see the humor in it … even my mother sees the humor in it … once I allowed myself to ease up and see the humor, my mother felt a lot better. She enjoyed laughing about it.” — Deborah Hoffmann

• "She is the ultimate of living in the moment," Hoffmann says proudly of her mother in the film's closing monologue. "She's sort of the ultimate enlightened person."

• "This is the best film about Alzheimer's disease that I've seen, and I've seen quite a few... film critic Gene Siskel

 • "Unflinchingly honest...a film that will give hope to Alzheimer's caregivers as well as early-stage Alzheimer's patients." — Marcia Freedman, American Society on Aging

• Watch an 8-minute excerpt of Complaints of a Dutiful Daughter below:

Inside Every Adult is a Kid . . .

 graphics: Waldorf of the Muppets; Calvin from Bill Watterson's Calvin & Hobbes quote: rottenecards.com

 Above: Animated characters: Waldorf of the Muppets; Calvin from Bill Watterson's Calvin and Hobbes. Quote: rottenecards.com

• Tribute: Few cartoonists compare with the genius of Bill Watterson (b. 7.5.58) in his Calvin and Hobbes strip (1985-95), as exemplified by the two panels used in the animation above.

 Former cartoonist  Bill Watterson

Former cartoonist Bill Watterson

• Bill Watterson: "Personally, I like paper and ink better than glowing pixels, but to each his own. Obviously the role of comics is changing very fast. On the one hand, I don’t think comics have ever been more widely accepted or taken as seriously as they are now. On the other hand, the mass media is disintegrating, and audiences are atomizing."

Full interview: http://mentalfloss.com/article/53216/mental-floss-exclusive-our-interview-bill-watterson

Similar to animated quote at top:

• “Inside every adult there's still a child that lingers.” — Guy Laliberte

 • “I think that inside every adult is the heart of a child.” — Shigeru Miyamoto

 • “Inside every adult is a magical child to discover.”  — Bruce Davis

• “For in every adult there dwells the child that was, and in every child there lies the adult that will be.” ― John Connolly

 Above: Panel from  Matt Groening's  Life in Hell

Above: Panel from Matt Groening's Life in Hell


Female on the Beach, Updated

 fizzdom.com female at the beach john grimes joan crawford jeff chandler updated iPhone iPad 

• Above: Imagining if the 1955 movie, "Female on the Beach," was remade for today's multi-tasking market.

• Below: Popular, mostly-American beach movies, followed by a link to the best beach scenes in movies.

 Jaws - 1975

Jaws - 1975

 Blue Hawaii - 1961 

Blue Hawaii - 1961 

 The Endless Summer - 1966

The Endless Summer - 1966

 Cast Away - 2000

Cast Away - 2000

 Gidget - 1959

Gidget - 1959

 Y Tu Mama También - 2001

Y Tu Mama También - 2001

 Beaches - 1988

Beaches - 1988

 Point Break - 1991

Point Break - 1991

 Lord of the Flies - 1990

Lord of the Flies - 1990

 The Blue Lagoon - 1980

The Blue Lagoon - 1980

 Blue Crush - 2002

Blue Crush - 2002

 Above: The controversial  kiss scene  in  From Here to Eternity,  1953 Below: Watch the  video clip

Above: The controversial kiss scene in From Here to Eternity, 1953
Below: Watch the video clip

Click the following link for more from an English paper's list of the 50 best beach scenes in the movies: http://www.telegraph.co.uk/culture/film/3558960/The-50-best-beach-scenes-in-the-movies.html

 Above:  After Amazon buys all the beaches.

Above: After Amazon buys all the beaches.

 Source: Wikipedia

Source: Wikipedia

Love Can Be Fleeting

 • Comedian  Richard Lewis  (b. 1947) with improbable partners

• Comedian Richard Lewis (b. 1947) with improbable partners

• "My husband and I divorced over religious differences. He thought he was God, and I didn’t." — unknown

• "Arguments about money are by far the top predictor of divorce. It's not children, sex, in-laws or anything else. It's money    for both men and women." — Sonya Britt, Kansas State University study

"The median length for a marriage in the US today is 11 years." — wikipedia

• 41% to 50% of first marriages, 60% to 67% of second marriages and 73% to 74% of third marriages end in divorce — divorcepad.com (citing two studies)

 • Above: Divorce cakes

• Above: Divorce cakes

• A 2012 University of Michigan study “found that when a husband reported having a close relationship with his wife's parents, the couple's risk of divorce decreased by 20 percent. On the other hand, when a wife reported having a close relationship with her husband's parents, the couple's risk of divorce increased by 20 percent.” — huffpost.com

• Watch theOnion.com's hysterically life-like video above

Why Women Mate

 John Grimes cartoon (autobiographical) • grimescartoons.com

John Grimes cartoon (autobiographical) • grimescartoons.com

• “It isn’t enough to love; we must prove it." — St. Therese of Lisieux  (thx2 happiness project)

 • Above: Custom paintings of a couple's recorded wedding vows expressed as audio waveforms - ©aimee weaver aimeeweaverdesigns.com

• Above: Custom paintings of a couple's recorded wedding vows expressed as audio waveforms - ©aimee weaver aimeeweaverdesigns.com

• "If there is such a thing as a good marriage, it is because it resembles friendship rather than love." — Michel de Montaigne

• Above: "Business Time" — hilarious romantic video-tune by Flight of the Conchords (28m+ views)

• “About one in five relationships starts online.” — Sam Yagan, co-founder of OkCupid

"Why Women's Hands and Feet Get Colder than Men's" (excerpt below):

"It’s the hands, face and feet that tend to be coldest and that’s partly because they’re exposed, but it’s also because the body will sacrifice these extremities to keep the internal organs warm.

That’s why our hands turn white, and even blue, in the cold, and why those who survive extremely cold conditions lose fingers and toes to frostbite. However, in some people — typically women — this process can go haywire, causing their blood vessels to shut down even from a minimal amount of cold.

‘We know from studies that if you lower people’s temperatures by placing them in cold air, vasoconstriction happens more quickly in women,’ says Professor Tipton. ‘The blood flow to skin is shut down sooner and more intensely than in men, and afterwards it takes women longer to warm up.’ 

So even though women may feel the cold more than men, it’s their skin temperaturenot their core body temperature — that’s colder

Indeed, a study of 219 people published in The Lancet in 1998 showed that while the body temperature of the women who were studied was on average 0.4 f hotter than the men, their hands were 2.8 f colder. This is partly due to hormones

In women, the female hormone oestrogen regulates the peripheral blood vessels; high levels of this hormone make them more sensitive to temperature. As a result, a woman’s temperature will vary during her menstrual cycle as oestrogen levels rise and fall."  Chloe Lambert, dailymail.co.uk



Louis C.K. Doesn't Raise Kids

 louis c.k. fizzdom.dom gif quote comedian kids parents

• “We make shit up to be upset about. Like,
‘How come I have to choose a language on the ATM machine?  
It’s bullshit. I shouldn’t have to do that, I’m American.’”  

• "Boys just do damage to your house.
Girls, like, leave scars in your psyche."

• "Here’s how my brain works:
It’s stupidity,
followed by self-hatred,
and then further analysis."  

• "How many advantages can one person have?
I’m a white man!" 

• "C.K. described himself as a depressive kid. 'In junior high he took to drugs, closing myself off from feelings,' he says. 'Eighth and ninth grade were two solid years of dropping acid, snorting coke when somebody had it, quaaludes, an alarming amount of pot, mescaline, drinking. By the time I got to high school, I was a recovered drug addict.' (C.K. ran for a time with a bad crowd, breaking into cars and snatching valuables within.)"

• "After graduating from Newton North High School, C.K. worked as an auto mechanic and at a public access TV cable station in Boston, while 'summoning the courage to try stand-up.' Among other jobs he worked, C.K. cleaned pools, fixed cars and spent a year as a Kentucky Fried Chicken cook; he brought home KFC turkey dinners two Thanksgivings in a row. After that, he clerked at a video store."

• "C.K. and artist/painter Alix Bailey married in 1995 and divorced in 2008. Together, they had two daughters, with both C.K. and Bailey having joint custody." (bio: wikipedia)